Introduction
Hello, my name is Kacie, and I am a Family Recovery Coach assisting families who have loved one’s struggling with addiction. My hope with my blogging is to give helpful thoughts and tools to support people out there who find themselves on this difficult journey. I have been surrounded by addiction for decades, first in my marriage, them with my son. It was my son’s addiction that really pushed me to make changes and search for answers in my life. There is something about going through this with a child that hits differently, there were many times I just did not know how I would survive it.
How Did I Get Here
It has been over a decade since I discovered that my son had been using heroin for over a year, and what I did not know at that time is that this was the beginning of a very long, arduous journey. I have wrestled with what my role was in this for many years. Was it my fault, did my poor choices create this issue? Oh, the countless number of mistakes I have made as a parent. How will I save him? And let me tell you, I exhausted myself thinking I could! I have spent years in support groups, therapy, and have done an immense amount of research, soaking up any valuable information that I could get my hands on. What I have discovered is that I have no control over his choices, I can’t stop him from using drugs. I only have control over my own choices. I have found that the more I learned to focus on my own recovery from this traumatic life experience, the more I can be of better use to not only him, but everyone around me; and most importantly, myself. What I am so excited to share with others is that there is a functional, healthy way to address this issue; there are answers. And when I started to apply these things into my life it became more functional, and I gained peace.
Today my son is sober, and our relationship is better than I had ever hoped it could be. I know his sobriety can change; I understand the reality of this disease. I also know that regardless of what happens, I can be content and at peace with my choices; I finally have confidence in my own choices surrounding this issue. He knows I will always love him and will always be there for him, but he also knows that I will set boundaries to protect my peace and balance in my life, and I will never make choices that contribute to his addiction. He respects me for that, and I respect him for fighting the good fight and for all his continued efforts towards his sobriety.
Today
I try my best to take it one day at a time, count each blessing, and look for those special moments. Regaining control of your life is possible, you just need to take the first step towards helping yourself.
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